The Tragedy of the Bibas Family: A Personal Reflection on a Broken Peace
I want to start by saying that this is not a cybersecurity article. It has nothing to do with cybersecurity. I simply couldn’t bring myself to focus on my usual subject this week - Bibas Family
I want to start by saying that this is not a cybersecurity article. It has nothing to do with cybersecurity. I simply couldn’t bring myself to focus on my usual subject this week. The news from Israel has shattered my heart and the hearts of so many Jews, Israelis, and decent people around the world. Since October 7th, 2023, when Hamas attacked Israel and kidnapped more than 250 hostages, life has felt completely altered. Every hostage represents a world in itself, but the most iconic image from that awful day was the kidnapping of Shiri Bibas and her two young, red-haired children, Ariel (3 years old) and Kfir (9 months old).
Tragically, this week our worst fear came true when Hamas announced that Shiri and her children were murdered. Their bodies were returned, devastating people everywhere. My heart sank at the news, because the Bibas family is every family—people simply trying to live their lives. The Bibas family could have been my own family.
Why the Heartbreak?
On October 7th, 2023, every Jew in the world woke up to the horrific news of that day. More than 1,200 civilians were murdered for no other reason than being Jewish, and approximately 250 hostages were taken. The brutality of the attacks was shocking: Hamas terrorists entered Israeli towns along the border, killed entire families, and burned down homes. At the Nova music festival, they murdered partygoers, raped women, and kidnapped young men and women.
Since that day, the hostage crisis has been a daily part of my life. Below is a brief timeline of the first ceasefire and hostage-release deal that was struck between Israel and Hamas:
Early Ceasefire and Hostage Releases (November 2023)
November 18, 2023: Reports emerged of a tentative deal between Israel and Hamas to pause fighting for at least five days in exchange for the release of dozens of hostages. The plan involved releasing an initial 50 or more hostages in batches every 24 hours.
November 21–22, 2023: A truce was finalized, with Israel agreeing to a four-day ceasefire. This deal included Hamas releasing 53 hostages (mostly children and mothers) and Israel releasing 150 Palestinian prisoners (mostly women and minors). The hostages were transferred via Egypt.
November 30, 2023: By this point, Israel’s military pressure had secured the release of 102 hostages (78 Israelis and 24 foreign nationals), with two additional hostages found dead. Hamas still held 145 hostages from the October 7th attack, plus four from earlier incidents, including three under 18 and ten over 75 years old.
December 3, 2023: Two Israeli hostages, Aisha (17) and Bilal Ziyadne (18), kidnapped on October 7th, were released the previous week and discharged from the hospital—marking a small but significant milestone.
During this exchange, several mothers and children were released. However, the Bibas family was not included, and my heart sank again. The mere thought that a 9-month-old and a 3-year-old could be used as bargaining chips is nightmarish. It leaves me asking: who, in their right mind, kidnaps babies and toddlers?
To be clear, the Bibas family was not kidnapped by Hamas directly but by Palestinian civilians who joined a second wave of looters that day, taking advantage of the chaos to steal from nearby kibbutzim and towns. These people are the ones who kidnapped Shiri, Ariel, and Kfir.
I wish I could say I was surprised, but sadly I wasn’t. Having lived in Israel, traveled within other Middle Eastern countries, and spoken with people from the region, I’ve seen firsthand how certain leadership fosters hatred of Jews, starting at a very young age. At home, in schools, on TV, or in books, many Palestinians are taught to hate Jews. This was confirmed by stories from friends and family members who deployed to Gaza, saying they often found pictures of Hitler, copies of Mein Kampf, or children’s books encouraging the killing of Jews in many homes, labeling them "occupiers."
Meanwhile, much of the West—especially Europe and the U.S.—pushes for a peace process that can’t succeed if only one side acknowledges the other’s right to exist. The chant often heard on college campuses, “From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free,” is a call for the genocide of Jews. There can never be real peace while that is the mindset. The peace process is dead.
The price of this hatred became painfully clear on October 7th, and it manifested in the unimaginable brutality inflicted on the Bibas children. Forensic reports indicate they were strangled to death while in captivity, then their bodies were further abused to hide the cause of death. A 9-month-old baby and a 3-year-old toddler, incapable of harming anyone, were murdered in the most barbaric way possible. This is a war crime, and it is deplorable. It deserves nothing less than a definitive, unrelenting response against those responsible and those supporting them. It further proves why Hamas can’t be allowed to continue to have any presence in Gaza or anywhere near Israel’s borders.
The West’s Mistake
There is a tendency in the West to assume everyone wants—or should want—Western values and culture. But after the September 11th attacks, the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, the Arab Spring, and the Syrian Civil War, it has become clear that some cultures reject these values. The dominance of certain extremist interpretations of Islam often puts it on a collision course with secular democracy. In parts of Europe, where Muslim migration has been significant, the clash with local values is increasingly visible. Higher birth rates in some Muslim communities are rapidly altering demographics, and over time, this could lead to major societal and political shifts. Muhammed was the most popular name for baby boys last year in both France and the UK.
Israel also bought into a Western fantasy of coexistence. After the 1994 Oslo Accords, brokered with the help of then-President Bill Clinton, there was a dream of two states living side by side. The Oslo process began in 1993, when Israel and the Palestine Liberation Organization (PLO) signed the Declaration of Principles (often called Oslo I), recognizing each other’s legitimate rights. It established the Palestinian Authority with limited self-governance in parts of the West Bank and Gaza, and envisioned final-status negotiations within five years. In 1995, Oslo II expanded on these arrangements, dividing the West Bank into Areas A, B, and C with varying levels of Palestinian and Israeli administrative control. The assumption was that continued cooperation and good faith would lead to a lasting peace and a viable two-state solution.
Instead, waves of suicide bombings struck buses, restaurants, and malls, claiming thousands of Israeli civilian lives. As a child, I happened to be near a suicide bombing in Tel Aviv. I vividly remember that day: it was the Jewish holiday of Purim, and my friends and I went to the mall in our costumes to celebrate. As we were leaving, a suicide bomber blew himself up while crossing the crosswalk at Dizengoff Center, killing dozens of people and injuring hundreds. The sound, smell, and chaos from that day haunt me still.
Even more infuriating is that the terrorists responsible for these atrocities are often released in hostage exchanges—a practice the Israeli government has followed multiple times, though it’s frequently misunderstood abroad. Let me explain this a bit more: a reasonable person might ask why Israel would negotiate with terrorists to free hostages. The principle comes from the Torah itself: rescuing captured Jews is a major mitzvah in Judaism and a moral imperative in the Jewish tradition. Throughout its history, Israel has regularly entered into negotiations to bring back captured soldiers or civilians, and even the remains of the deceased, as part of its commitment to these fundamental values.
The Three Major Peace Offers After Oslo
Despite three separate Israeli offers to establish a Palestinian state after the Oslo Accords, each was rejected, and more bloodshed followed typically called an Intifada (If it sounds familiar, its some uneducated college students shout to back a cause they haven’t researched).
Camp David Summit (2000): Prime Minister Ehud Barak and Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat met at Camp David with President Bill Clinton mediating. Israel offered significant concessions on territory in the West Bank and Gaza, including most of East Jerusalem as the capital of a future Palestinian state. Arafat ultimately rejected the proposal, arguing it did not meet all Palestinian demands—particularly regarding refugees and full sovereignty over East Jerusalem. Shortly after, the Second Intifada (also known as the Al-Aqsa Intifada) broke out, leading to extensive violence on both sides.
Taba Talks (2001): In an attempt to salvage the peace process after the eruption of the Second Intifada, Israeli and Palestinian negotiators met in Taba, Egypt. The proposals discussed went even further than those at Camp David, with Israel offering additional land swaps and arrangements for shared governance in Jerusalem’s most sensitive areas. Although both sides reported that they had never been closer to a final agreement, the talks ended without a deal. Political turmoil in Israel and ongoing violence made further negotiations nearly impossible.
Olmert Plan (2008): Prime Minister Ehud Olmert presented Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas with what was considered one of the most far-reaching offers ever made by an Israeli leader. It included a near-complete withdrawal from the West Bank, land swaps to incorporate major settlement blocs into Israel, a shared arrangement for Jerusalem, and a symbolic acceptance of some Palestinian refugees. Abbas did not accept the offer and negotiations stalled, leading to another collapse in the peace process.
In each of these instances, the rejection of comprehensive offers led to increased violence and deeper distrust. The Second Intifada alone claimed thousands of lives. Each time talks broke down, violence spiked.
However On October 7th, 2023, the idea of “two states for two peoples” effectively died. Now that President Trump returned to office, any remaining hope of that idea will be buried for good. Israel is now more likely to annex Judea and Samaria, pull out of the Oslo Accords entirely, and retake territory, The US is going to support this and President Trump said just that several weeks ago, its time to try something else.
The Palestinian population in those areas might retain some civil control, many will leave to countries willing to accept them and the terrorist elements will be sought out and destroyed. Nations that support Palestinian refugees are welcome to receive them, as UNRWA (the UN relief agency accused of Hamas sympathies) may eventually be disbanded.
Gaza itself could change hands—Israel might retake it, or an international body might administer it with a drastically reduced population and a demand for Jews to resettle parts of Gaza that were evacuated in 2005 when Gaza was handed over to the Palestinians and then Hamas.
I have even proposed establishing three new Israeli towns in Gaza named after Shiri, Ariel, and Kfir, ensuring we never forget the atrocity that can happen when one forgets the harsh realities of the Middle East. The events of October 7th demand a price paid in land, deportation, and resettlement—because that is the nature of this part of the world. The Mentality of the Arab population only understands strengths and Israel must show strength and finish the job.
Today, I write these words feeling what so many Jews feel: alone, hurt, and disappointed. We’re disappointed by those who would justify the kidnapping of 250 civilians, the brutal murder of over 1,200 Israelis—including 45 Americans. It’s the largest death toll of Americans overseas outside a formal war zone since the 1983 Beirut barracks bombing.
I can’t bring myself to write about cybersecurity. I can’t pretend to be okay when I know that if circumstances were reversed, I’d be pleading for someone to speak up on my behalf.
Shiri, Ariel, and Kfir, I am so sorry this is your story. And to your husband and father, Yarden—who was also kidnapped but released a few weeks ago and now must bury his wife and children, along with the knowledge that his in-laws were murdered on October 7th—I am sorry. I wish I could hug you, tell you it’s going to be okay, and promise “Never again!” But I can’t lie.
The fact is, Yarden, our fight has only begun. By the time anyone reads this, 6 more hostages are to be released, leaving 63 more hostages in the hands of these murderers. We must bring all of them home, and we must eliminate every member of Hamas—whether in Gaza, Judea, or Samaria—because we cannot afford to lose. Jews have no other place to go but our ancestral homeland of Israel.
Am Israel Chai